Tips for Keeping Home as a Single Mother
Being a single mother means running an entire household solo. On one hand, it can be more efficient because there’s no one to confer with on decisions. On the other hand, every single chore and responsibility falls on you. There’s no divide-and-conquer strategy—if dinner is cooked, you’re the one cooking it, and if the dishes need to be cleaned, you’re the one scrubbing them. It takes a lot of effort to manage everything alone, which is why I’ve spent time thinking about ways to simplify my daily life, downsize where possible, and ensure that my most important priorities fit into each day.
My Non-Negotiables
There are certain things I need to do every day to keep my life running smoothly:
Work
Bathe
Interact with my kids
Eat
Tidy up
Connect with family or friends
Have alone time
Get in physical exercise
Get enough sleep
Engage in creative pursuits and interests
I’ve identified these as important to my life. I would guess that most people would have fairly similar lists, maybe more, maybe less. If your list looks anything like this you know it’s hard to get all of this done during a day.
But, when there’s a will there’s a way.
Well, to some extent.
More important than anything, I’ve learned that removing things from my life is the only way to make space for the things that mean the most to me.
Here are some of the strategies I’ve adopted to make these things happen:
Scaling Back on Cooking
One of the biggest daily time drains is mealtime—maintaining a pantry, shopping for ingredients, prepping food, cooking, and then cleaning up. While I still prepare my own breakfasts and lunches (usually something simple like a shake, scrambled eggs, or a salad bowl), I’ve found ways to outsource dinner. I’ve written another blog post about the different dinner solutions I use, but in short, I no longer feel obligated to cook full meals every single night. This alone has freed up a significant amount of time and energy.
Simplifying My Wardrobe and Beauty Routine
I used to have a closet full of clothes, accessories, and makeup that I rarely wore. Eventually, I realized I was always reaching for the same few outfits. Now, I keep my wardrobe minimal—just enough to get through work, school pickups, and the occasional café visit. If a special event comes up, I’ll get an outfit specifically for that occasion. Otherwise, I regularly sell or donate items that no longer serve me.
Having fewer clothes means:
Less laundry
Easier outfit choices
Fewer unnecessary purchases
Though I enjoy variety, I satisfy that need by occasionally thrifting, on the condition that I donate an equal amount of items before bringing anything new home. At the end of each year, I update a few key staples, but I also make an effort to fully use what I already own.
Making a Daily List
I don’t just make general to-do lists, I create an hour-by-hour schedule when my days are particularly full or when I’m trying to work in a new routine. This helps me stay on track and ensures that I allocate time to the things that matter most.
When you treat the hours of your day like a budget, you’re more likely to devote those hours to the things that will make the most difference.
Keeping Things Tidy During the Week and Deep Cleaning on Weekends
Cleaning routines seen on social media are often unrealistic. Unlike influencers who clean for a living, I only have about 30 minutes a day, at best, for tidying up. My personal bare minimum for a week includes:
Scrubbing the toilet
Vacuuming
Washing my sheets
Clearing out the fridge
Everything else gets handled when I have time. I don’t stress about a little dust—it’s not a health hazard, and my allergies will tell me when it’s time to clean properly.
Stopping Leisure Shopping and Unfollowing Lifestyle Influencers
At one point, I realized how much time and money I was spending on shopping simply because it was a habit. Cutting down on unnecessary purchases has been healthier for both my finances and my mental space. I also unfollowed lifestyle influencers who made me feel like I needed to buy more things to have a “better” home. The less I focus on shopping, the more I appreciate what I already have. This is an example of taking back some of the attention that I was giving toward activities that were not fulfilling. I have instead funneled this time and attention toward creative pursuits that do bring a lot of personal satisfaction and give me an outlet of expression. For me these activities provide longer lasting positive effects on my life and decenter the idea of consumerism.
Letting Go of Extras That Don’t Fit My Life Right Now
There was a time when I loved hosting dinner parties and putting together elaborate holiday celebrations. Right now, however, my focus is on creating financial security and maintaining my household without unnecessary stress. That doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy socializing, I just find different, simpler ways to connect with people. Letting go of these extras has allowed me to focus on what truly matters in my current stage of life.
Prioritizing Rest and Self-Care
While I’ve minimized effort in many areas, this is the one place where additions are welcome. My physical health and energy levels are what keep everything running. This means:
Staying physically active
Eating well
Sleeping enough
One of the most impactful changes I’ve made is incorporating small moments of rest throughout my day. Instead of rushing from one task to the next, I allow myself to pause. Before making breakfast, for example, I sit down for a few minutes and simply breathe. These small breaks help me reset and prevent burnout.
Final Thoughts
Keeping a home as a single mother is no small feat, but by simplifying routines, reducing unnecessary obligations, and prioritizing what truly matters, it is possible to create a life that feels more manageable and fulfilling.